Largsoming is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, grumpy pigeon.

Largsoming created a Higgs boson four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Largsoming, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Largsoming, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Largsoming's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Largsoming's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Never eat cherries.

3. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

4. Erect a giant violet sculpture of Largsoming in the centre of the settlement.

5. Always store coconuts above ground.