Cumbarnpan is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, grumpy butterfly.

Cumbarnpan created the Sol system nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumbarnpan, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cumbarnpan, she will turn you into a mouse.

Cumbarnpan's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Cumbarnpan's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never laugh near birds.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Cumbarnpan.

5. Do not keep eight dogs in a large pit.

Babrullcid Komraptailflowsagtag is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, resourceful wolf.

Babrullcid Komraptailflowsagtag created the Large Magellanic Cloud two million years ago.

If you believe in Babrullcid Komraptailflowsagtag, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Babrullcid Komraptailflowsagtag, she will turn you into a sheep.

Babrullcid Komraptailflowsagtag's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Babrullcid Komraptailflowsagtag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Always keep your back turned to the south at sunset.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Always make sure there are no tapirs in a building before entering it.

5. Never talk about amino acids.

Farstertof is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, fast seal.

Farstertof created the planet Saturn three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Farstertof, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Farstertof, she will have a low opinion of you.

Farstertof's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Farstertof's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never pray while filled with joy.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Put Farstertof first in all things.

5. Do not wear mauve clothing.

Zogtargfeb is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, wise deer.

Zogtargfeb created time and space three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zogtargfeb, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Zogtargfeb, she will refuse to believe in you.

Zogtargfeb's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Zogtargfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare apples while wearing dresses.

2. Retreat if nine otters approach from the east.

3. Do not contemplate ultrasonics during the night.

4. Never fashion tools from clay.

5. Do not speak of quantum gravity near sacred fires.

Godnurtkar is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, all-powerful dog.

Godnurtkar created the Black Eye Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Godnurtkar, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Godnurtkar, he will cry a lot.

Godnurtkar's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Godnurtkar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not leap in public.

2. Never fashion tools from bone.

3. Never speak the names of asteroids aloud.

4. Erect a large silver sculpture of Godnurtkar on top of all buildings.

5. Never wear stockings.

Bigfatbed is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, overgenerous squid.

Bigfatbed created the planet Jupiter six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bigfatbed, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bigfatbed, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Bigfatbed's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Bigfatbed's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near squirrels while wearing white kilts and balancing nine nickel spheres on your legs.

3. Never allow horses to sleep beneath your roof.

4. Do not sprint in public.

5. Do not drink alcohol.

Sugcadget Rilvabgarraknurt Witlamcem is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, clever sheep.

Sugcadget Rilvabgarraknurt Witlamcem created a charm quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sugcadget Rilvabgarraknurt Witlamcem, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Sugcadget Rilvabgarraknurt Witlamcem, it will turn you into a rat.

Sugcadget Rilvabgarraknurt Witlamcem's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Sugcadget Rilvabgarraknurt Witlamcem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion sacred items from ash.

2. Do not take Sugcadget Rilvabgarraknurt Witlamcem's name in vain.

3. Do not kill mites.

4. Never look at black holes.

5. Never eat strawberries on days of mourning.

Natcatbonk is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, narcissistic mongoose.

Natcatbonk created the Milkyway five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Natcatbonk, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Natcatbonk, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Natcatbonk's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Natcatbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow tapirs to witness sacred rites.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Natcatbonk.

3. Always store parsnips above ground.

4. Never cross crossroads at dawn.

5. Never travel toward the north during autumn.