Zanbossfly is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, confident skunk.

Zanbossfly created a bottom quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Zanbossfly, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Zanbossfly, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Zanbossfly's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Zanbossfly's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if eight gulls approach from the east.

2. Never speak aloud of secrets.

3. Never talk about dark energy near otters while wearing red coats and balancing five zinc spheres on your arms.

4. Never run near goats.

5. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

Legdidsomraw is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, merciful centipede.

Legdidsomraw created the cosmos five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Legdidsomraw, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Legdidsomraw, it will turn you into a rat.

Legdidsomraw's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Legdidsomraw's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry great tits.

2. Do not speak sacred words in autumn.

3. Never record signs.

4. Always check lakes for frogs.

5. Do not eat apples.

Sinpognart is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, awe-inspiring otter.

Sinpognart created vertebrates eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sinpognart, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Sinpognart, she will strike you with lightening.

Sinpognart's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Sinpognart's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from cyan cats, for they are unholy.

2. Never speak aloud of signs.

3. Never mix beans with ash.

4. Erect nine lead sculptures of Sinpognart on top of important buildings.

5. Pray towards the south.

Pigvintig is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, quiet gerbil.

Pigvintig created a down quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Pigvintig, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Pigvintig, she will turn you into a rat.

Pigvintig's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Pigvintig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not study bacteria on holy days.

2. Put Pigvintig first in all things.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Erect seven gold sculptures of Pigvintig on top of important buildings.

5. Do not speak of quantum field theory near sacred fires.

Ripgepligzim is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, fussy unicorn.

Ripgepligzim created an up quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ripgepligzim, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Ripgepligzim, it will be mildly annoyed.

Ripgepligzim's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Ripgepligzim's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove shirts before touching copper.

2. Always store melons above ground.

3. Never handle tin while unclean.

4. Never carve symbols of asteroids into wood.

5. Do not chop down trees.

Nartdubcan is a god.

It takes the form of a small, benevolent penguin.

Nartdubcan created a quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nartdubcan, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Nartdubcan, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Nartdubcan's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Nartdubcan's Holy Commandments

1. Never handle titanium while unclean.

2. Never think about photosynthesis.

3. Never discuss evolution by means of natural selection in public assemblies.

4. Never prepare cherries during spring.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

Sawpaskarpibtombidcumnig Dapmabnan is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, astonishing goose.

Sawpaskarpibtombidcumnig Dapmabnan created Africa three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sawpaskarpibtombidcumnig Dapmabnan, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Sawpaskarpibtombidcumnig Dapmabnan, he will manifest in front of you.

Sawpaskarpibtombidcumnig Dapmabnan's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Sawpaskarpibtombidcumnig Dapmabnan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Shun those given to sloth.

4. Never pray while filled with fear.

5. Never prepare rice during autumn.

Weepakdub is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, cheerful scorpion.

Weepakdub created everything that exists eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Weepakdub, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Weepakdub, it will turn you into a rat.

Weepakdub's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Weepakdub's Holy Commandments

1. Never discuss nucleic acids in public assemblies.

2. Always remove stockings before touching tin.

3. Do not jump in public.

4. Never touch oil while unclean.

5. Respect your elders.