Vabwegtetti is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, dishonest mink.

Vabwegtetti created silver five billion years ago.

If you believe in Vabwegtetti, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Vabwegtetti, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Vabwegtetti's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Vabwegtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity near grasshopers while wearing magenta dresses and balancing five platinum spheres on your legs.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not travel during winter.

4. Do not prepare parsnips while wearing ear rings.

5. Run away from mauve aardvarks, for they are unholy.

Bossranhad is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, moody dingo.

Bossranhad created parasitic wasps four billion years ago.

If you believe in Bossranhad, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Bossranhad, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Bossranhad's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Bossranhad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Bossranhad in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never allow foxes to witness sacred rites.

4. Do not keep six geese in a large pit.

5. Never speak the names of nebulae aloud.

Bogfidgen is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, emotional newt.

Bogfidgen created the Whirlpool Galaxy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bogfidgen, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bogfidgen, he will not care.

Bogfidgen's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Bogfidgen's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather four snails near towers.

2. You must pray to Bogfidgen five times a day.

3. Never feed lots of apples to foxes while wearing turquoise boots.

4. Do not consume lemons at dawn.

5. Never proclaim while facing east.

Cubnilhas is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, humane pig.

Cubnilhas created the world three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cubnilhas, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Cubnilhas, he will torture you forever.

Cubnilhas' most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Cubnilhas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not gather at towers at dawn.

2. Do not utter prayers while touching copper.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Do not kill squirrels.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cubnilhas.

Sigflagtonk is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, stupid faun.

Sigflagtonk created the planet Venus two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sigflagtonk, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Sigflagtonk, he will make you grow a tail.

Sigflagtonk's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Sigflagtonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always maintain obedience during days of mourning.

2. Do not hurt otters.

3. Do not wear copper on your body.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Sigflagtonk on top of all buildings.

Dapdagxuc is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, blissful raven.

Dapdagxuc created Africa six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dapdagxuc, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Dapdagxuc, it will turn you into a dog.

Dapdagxuc's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Dapdagxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Do not wear jumpers marked with violet.

3. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.

4. Never think ill of sick shrews.

5. Run away from green birds, for they are unholy.

Bogdogcitnibventig is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, weak crab.

Bogdogcitnibventig created the Sombrero Galaxy six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bogdogcitnibventig, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bogdogcitnibventig, she will turn you into a slug.

Bogdogcitnibventig's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Bogdogcitnibventig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Always help sick snakes.

3. Never point your arms toward the west during prayer.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

Hakarnjadhanarpwikpom is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unjust hamster.

Hakarnjadhanarpwikpom created the Small Magellanic Cloud seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hakarnjadhanarpwikpom, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Hakarnjadhanarpwikpom, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Hakarnjadhanarpwikpom's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Hakarnjadhanarpwikpom's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five snails approach from the north.

2. Do not speak sacred words in autumn.

3. Always check lakes for frogs.

4. Never mix cucumbers with oil.

5. Never eat green fruit.