Yarlbutrot Weecebbiss is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, uncaring dugong.

Yarlbutrot Weecebbiss created an up quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Yarlbutrot Weecebbiss, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Yarlbutrot Weecebbiss, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Yarlbutrot Weecebbiss' most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Yarlbutrot Weecebbiss' Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured voles.

2. Do not eat bread.

3. Never mark doors with orange.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Yarlbutrot Weecebbiss.

Dunbidvaghogjapwap is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, humorless toad.

Dunbidvaghogjapwap created viruses four years ago.

If you believe in Dunbidvaghogjapwap, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Dunbidvaghogjapwap, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Dunbidvaghogjapwap's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Dunbidvaghogjapwap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about bananas.

2. Always remove shirts before touching carbon.

3. Run away from green ants, for they are unholy.

4. Never feed lentils to turtles while wearing coats.

5. Never eat figs on holy days.

Wondumnabven is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, stupid lobster.

Wondumnabven created the planet Earth five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wondumnabven, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Wondumnabven, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Wondumnabven's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Wondumnabven's Holy Commandments

1. Never pray while filled with anger.

2. Do not kill nematodes.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never skip in the presence of dolphins.

5. Never eat bark.

Begxengud is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, capable dragon.

Begxengud created vertebrates three million years ago.

If you believe in Begxengud, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Begxengud, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Begxengud's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Begxengud's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about enzymes.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Do not speak about strawberries.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always obey Begxengud's priests.

Cipgubhot is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, duplicitous crab.

Cipgubhot created a Higgs boson eight million years ago.

If you believe in Cipgubhot, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cipgubhot, it will send you a sign.

Cipgubhot's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Cipgubhot's Holy Commandments

1. Never discuss evolution by means of natural selection in public assemblies.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Always wear plain shoes during rituals.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not place cherries upon stone.

Ragvoging is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, witty hummingbird.

Ragvoging created everything that exists nine million years ago.

If you believe in Ragvoging, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Ragvoging, it will turn you into a frog.

Ragvoging's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Ragvoging's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Worship no other gods but Ragvoging.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Do not trade with those who eat tomatoes.

5. Do not chop down trees.

Gudgephin is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, pitiless fox.

Gudgephin created the Virgo Supercluster three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gudgephin, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gudgephin, she will send you a sign.

Gudgephin's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Gudgephin's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Gudgephin three times a day.

2. Pray only in shadows.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always wear plain scarves during rituals.

5. Do not consume grapes at dawn.

Himnurt is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, happy snake.

Himnurt created the Black Eye Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Himnurt, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Himnurt, he will curse you with boils.

Himnurt's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Himnurt's Holy Commandments

1. Never fashion tools from wood.

2. Horses are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not count beyond five during ceremonies.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never prepare apples during summer.