Metdamkon is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, tiresome dragon.

Metdamkon created the Small Magellanic Cloud seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Metdamkon, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Metdamkon, she will turn you into a snail.

Metdamkon's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Metdamkon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat garlic.

2. Do not count beyond six during ceremonies.

3. Snails are not to be trusted.

4. Never talk about moons.

5. Always store apples above ground.

Yimfunbum Davyikkab is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, strong raccoon.

Yimfunbum Davyikkab created the cosmos seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yimfunbum Davyikkab, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Yimfunbum Davyikkab, it will turn you into a worm.

Yimfunbum Davyikkab's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Yimfunbum Davyikkab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near ants while wearing mauve trousers and balancing seven lead spheres on your neck.

2. Always wear blue.

3. Never gather five squirrels near towers.

4. Do not hurt shrews.

5. Always remove tights before entering holy places.

Zogruttdab is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, generous goblin.

Zogruttdab created a charm quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Zogruttdab, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Zogruttdab, she will refuse to believe in you.

Zogruttdab's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Zogruttdab's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Zogruttdab must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never wear cyan corsets on sacred days.

4. Never hop near whales.

5. Never adorn your feet with white markings.

Boptabnan Rotcuttun is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, fast faun.

Boptabnan Rotcuttun created an electron eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Boptabnan Rotcuttun, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Boptabnan Rotcuttun, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Boptabnan Rotcuttun's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Boptabnan Rotcuttun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never write about optics.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Always remove scarves before entering holy places.

5. Never prepare spinach during summer.

Bapteenbid is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, uncaring swan.

Bapteenbid created energy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bapteenbid, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Bapteenbid, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Bapteenbid's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Bapteenbid's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Always cleanse ash with water.

3. Always count to five before sleeping.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Always take life seriously.

Vegdamfut Dussnelbud is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, idiotic crow.

Vegdamfut Dussnelbud created the Black Eye Galaxy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vegdamfut Dussnelbud, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Vegdamfut Dussnelbud, he will destroy your favourite star.

Vegdamfut Dussnelbud's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Vegdamfut Dussnelbud's Holy Commandments

1. Remain prostrate during prayer.

2. Never think about optics near moths while wearing red shirts and balancing four carbon spheres on your neck.

3. Never eat rice.

4. You must never eat nuts.

5. Never speak aloud of numbers.

Komyimmat is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, wise gerbil.

Komyimmat created the Sun seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Komyimmat, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Komyimmat, she will not care.

Komyimmat's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Komyimmat's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Never sprint in the presence of elders.

3. Worship no other gods but Komyimmat.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sharks.

Logflyomt is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, wise toad.

Logflyomt created gold two million years ago.

If you believe in Logflyomt, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Logflyomt, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Logflyomt's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Logflyomt's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Never leap in the presence of seals.

3. Never paint your hands red.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Always remove trousers before touching nickel.