Riggubhas Nablaghon is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, uncaring crane.

Riggubhas Nablaghon created the Whirlpool Galaxy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Riggubhas Nablaghon, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Riggubhas Nablaghon, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Riggubhas Nablaghon's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Riggubhas Nablaghon's Holy Commandments

1. Always act with purity.

2. You must pray to Riggubhas Nablaghon seven times a day.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate badgers.

4. Never discuss photosynthesis in public assemblies.

5. Shun those given to greed.

Sisnillaf is a god.

It takes the form of a small, clever chicken.

Sisnillaf created light twelve years ago.

If you believe in Sisnillaf, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Sisnillaf, it will throw large rocks at you.

Sisnillaf's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Sisnillaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill mites.

2. Remain standing during prayer.

3. Never bounce in holy places.

4. Do not leap in public.

5. Do not listen to music.

Donbatomt is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, annoying alligator.

Donbatomt created the Cigar Galaxy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Donbatomt, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Donbatomt, he will jump up and down on your head.

Donbatomt's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Donbatomt's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Donbatomt nine times a day.

2. Do not study deoxyribonucleic acid on holy days.

3. Never speak at midday.

4. Donbatomt loves monkeys, so they must be honoured.

5. Never feed apples to dogs while wearing trousers.

Bogjonyarl is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, boastful mole.

Bogjonyarl created the Virgo Supercluster five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bogjonyarl, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bogjonyarl, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Bogjonyarl's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Bogjonyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Always cleanse your hands after touching platinum.

3. Always cleanse water with water.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.

Tonknuttwat is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, deceitful wasp.

Tonknuttwat created the Virgo Supercluster seven million years ago.

If you believe in Tonknuttwat, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Tonknuttwat, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Tonknuttwat's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Tonknuttwat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak of quantum mechanics near sacred fires.

2. Never write about chlorophyll.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Put Tonknuttwat first in all things.

5. Never remain kneeling at midnight.

Midpangbast is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, proud jackal.

Midpangbast created water five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Midpangbast, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Midpangbast, it will have a low opinion of you.

Midpangbast's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Midpangbast's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Erect five platinum sculptures of Midpangbast on top of important buildings.

3. Hamsters are not to be trusted.

4. Never speak the names of black holes aloud.

5. Always store strawberries above ground.

Stiparfgud is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, quiet mole.

Stiparfgud created the Small Magellanic Cloud four million years ago.

If you believe in Stiparfgud, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Stiparfgud, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Stiparfgud's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Stiparfgud's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in brown.

2. Never gather four shrews in one place.

3. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

4. Do not speak about bread.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

Cemarnhoggup is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, quiet ferret.

Cemarnhoggup created the Sun four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cemarnhoggup, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Cemarnhoggup, she will boil you in a big pot.

Cemarnhoggup's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Cemarnhoggup's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never allow voles to sleep beneath your roof.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not fashion tools from copper.

5. Never adorn your face with violet markings.