Cunbidhom is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, selfish wyvern.

Cunbidhom created snails eight million years ago.

If you believe in Cunbidhom, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Cunbidhom, it will make you grow a tail.

Cunbidhom's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Cunbidhom's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if three eagles approach from the north.

2. Never paint your hands magenta.

3. Never think ill of sick moths.

4. Always wash your head before prayer.

5. Always share cherries with strangers, but never with dogs.

Bumvigsid is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, selfish dragonfly.

Bumvigsid created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bumvigsid, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bumvigsid, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Bumvigsid's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Bumvigsid's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if four foxes approach from the west.

2. Do not record names concerning dwarf planets.

3. Always cleanse your hands after touching carbon.

4. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in black.

5. Erect a giant green sculpture of Bumvigsid in the centre of the settlement.

Parkbasshat is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, humane hedgehog.

Parkbasshat created carbon nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Parkbasshat, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Parkbasshat, it will destroy your home solar system.

Parkbasshat's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Parkbasshat's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never whisper while facing west.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate nematodes.

5. Do not keep seven manatees in a large pit.

Siskinhun is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, ill-tempered meerkat.

Siskinhun created bats two million years ago.

If you believe in Siskinhun, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Siskinhun, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Siskinhun's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Siskinhun's Holy Commandments

1. Siskinhun loves snakes, so they must be respected.

2. Do not kill whales.

3. Always maintain humility during fasting days.

4. Never point your neck toward the south during prayer.

5. Never talk about fire.

Appsagflis is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, deceitful newt.

Appsagflis created the Sun two million years ago.

If you believe in Appsagflis, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Appsagflis, he will turn you into a tree.

Appsagflis' most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Appsagflis' Holy Commandments

1. Hide if eight porpoises approach from the south.

2. You must never eat figs.

3. Heed all visions.

4. Run away if four voles approach from the west.

5. You must love Appsagflis.

Carortbet is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, selfish tortoise.

Carortbet created the Cigar Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Carortbet, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Carortbet, it will torture you forever.

Carortbet's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Carortbet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not study amino acids on holy days.

2. Never gather eight horses in one place.

3. Always act with purity.

4. Never discuss eukaryotes in public assemblies.

5. Never point your feet toward the east during prayer.

Vonkdogsat is a god.

It takes the form of a large, weak swallow.

Vonkdogsat created a top quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Vonkdogsat, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Vonkdogsat, it will not care.

Vonkdogsat's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Vonkdogsat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not skip at rivers.

2. Never speak at midnight.

3. Never wear green shoes on sacred days.

4. Do not record names concerning stars.

5. Never think about cell theory.

Artkipten is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, annoying squid.

Artkipten created the Andromeda Galaxy four years ago.

If you believe in Artkipten, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Artkipten, he will turn you into a plant.

Artkipten's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Artkipten's Holy Commandments

1. Doves are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Do not hurt great tits.

3. Never write about moons.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not speak about spinach.