Sasjat is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, calm skunk.

Sasjat created Asia seven million years ago.

If you believe in Sasjat, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Sasjat, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Sasjat's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Sasjat's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always face the west before speaking sacred words.

3. Do not keep three snails in a large pit.

4. Always share lentils with strangers, but never with geese.

5. Do not wear hats marked with magenta.

Futhonfadgundog is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, all-knowing dugong.

Futhonfadgundog created the Black Eye Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Futhonfadgundog, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Futhonfadgundog, she will turn you into a dog.

Futhonfadgundog's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Futhonfadgundog's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Worship no other gods but Futhonfadgundog.

3. Do not drink water in purple rooms.

4. Do not name children after shrews.

5. Fast once a month.

Larngepsog is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, merciful seal.

Larngepsog created a down quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Larngepsog, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Larngepsog, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Larngepsog's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Larngepsog's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never feed peas to shrews while wearing trousers.

3. Always remove boots before entering holy places.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not wear yellow clothing.

Quimsislam is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, overgenerous finch.

Quimsislam created parasitic wasps nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Quimsislam, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Quimsislam, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Quimsislam's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Quimsislam's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing in summer.

2. You must pray to Quimsislam six times a day.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always count to seven before sleeping.

Wigcenarf is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, amazing hamster.

Wigcenarf created vertebrates three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wigcenarf, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Wigcenarf, it will be very unhappy.

Wigcenarf's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Wigcenarf's Holy Commandments

1. Erect six carbon sculptures of Wigcenarf on top of important buildings.

2. Never eat aubergines.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Always cleanse water with water.

5. Never whisper while facing east.

Pibpoppon is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, unsympathetic tortoise.

Pibpoppon created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Pibpoppon, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Pibpoppon, she will destroy your home solar system.

Pibpoppon's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Pibpoppon's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never travel toward the north during autumn.

3. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in pink.

4. Do not take Pibpoppon's name in vain.

5. Never talk about thermodynamics near mites while wearing indigo shirts.

Jadjarnflamliplarnmatnill is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, weak scorpion.

Jadjarnflamliplarnmatnill created a quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Jadjarnflamliplarnmatnill, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Jadjarnflamliplarnmatnill, it will turn you into a tree.

Jadjarnflamliplarnmatnill's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Jadjarnflamliplarnmatnill's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never jump in spring.

3. Do not speak about apples.

4. Feed all hungry nematodes.

5. Do not fashion tools from carbon.

Kondandap is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, prudent wasp.

Kondandap created energy four years ago.

If you believe in Kondandap, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Kondandap, it will curse you with boils.

Kondandap's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Kondandap's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather nine tapirs near wells.

2. Never feed peas to badgers while wearing black stockings.

3. Always share carrots with strangers, but never with snails.

4. Always make sure there are no birds in a building before entering it.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.