Wegbogweg is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, sapient bat.

Wegbogweg created oxygen nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wegbogweg, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Wegbogweg, she will refuse to believe in you.

Wegbogweg's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Wegbogweg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak sacred words in summer.

2. Never wear gray stockings.

3. Never tolerate laughter in holy places.

4. Never pray while filled with fear.

5. Remain kneeling during prayer.

Rutbappinkap is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, confident gorilla.

Rutbappinkap created the planet Saturn eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rutbappinkap, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Rutbappinkap, she will ignore you.

Rutbappinkap's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Rutbappinkap's Holy Commandments

1. Never travel toward the west during spring.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never talk about birds.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. You must never eat onions.

Ingbissflow is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, calm monkey.

Ingbissflow created the planet Venus two billion years ago.

If you believe in Ingbissflow, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Ingbissflow, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Ingbissflow's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Ingbissflow's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion sacred items from ash.

2. Do not kill mites.

3. Always wash your hands before prayer.

4. Hide from yellow geese for they are unholy.

5. Always wear plain corsets during rituals.

Nartnullhad is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, egotistical mongoose.

Nartnullhad created the Virgo Supercluster nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nartnullhad, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nartnullhad, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Nartnullhad's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Nartnullhad's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your feet white.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never allow snails to witness sacred rites.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never sit in holy places.

Rillpangtettijenvabpanlak is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, ruthless fairy.

Rillpangtettijenvabpanlak created light eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Rillpangtettijenvabpanlak, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rillpangtettijenvabpanlak, it will strike you with lightening.

Rillpangtettijenvabpanlak's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Rillpangtettijenvabpanlak's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if three shrews approach from the west.

2. Never feed spinach to seals while wearing kilts.

3. You must pray to Rillpangtettijenvabpanlak four times a day.

4. Always wear indigo.

5. Never talk about dwarf planets.

Vaggubjon is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, selfish zebra.

Vaggubjon created a quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vaggubjon, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Vaggubjon, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Vaggubjon's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Vaggubjon's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Vaggubjon.

3. Never speak aloud of names.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always help sick dolphins.

Hogjarncimtapcipmut is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, happy porpoise.

Hogjarncimtapcipmut created vertebrates three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hogjarncimtapcipmut, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Hogjarncimtapcipmut, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Hogjarncimtapcipmut's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Hogjarncimtapcipmut's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Do not speak of thermodynamics near sacred fires.

3. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Never write about solid mechanics.

5. Never run in the presence of elders.

Kimbun is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, fussy bear.

Kimbun created an electron four million years ago.

If you believe in Kimbun, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Kimbun, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Kimbun's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Kimbun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not utter prayers while touching zinc.

2. Never gather seven bats near bridges.

3. Erect a giant silicon sculpture of Kimbun in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never eat nuts on fasting days.

5. Kimbun loves whales, so they must be respected.