Boss is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, all-knowing frog.

Boss created the cosmos twelve years ago.

If you believe in Boss, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Boss, it will turn you into a tree.

Boss' most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Boss' Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in turquoise.

2. Never allow mice to sleep beneath your roof.

3. Do not consume strawberries at dawn.

4. Never cross forests at midday.

5. Always check lakes for frogs.

Safsasstip is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, idiotic beaver.

Safsasstip created the Black Eye Galaxy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Safsasstip, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Safsasstip, she will have a low opinion of you.

Safsasstip's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Safsasstip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not contemplate electromagnetism during the night.

2. Never write about galaxies.

3. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Hide if five snails approach from the north.

5. Do not stand on grass.

Mobbimceb is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, loving cow.

Mobbimceb created the Whirlpool Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mobbimceb, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Mobbimceb, she will refuse to believe in you.

Mobbimceb's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Mobbimceb's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Always help mites.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Heed all visions.

5. Do not trade with those who eat lentils.

Bodmutbellsidkipfaglarn is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, confident shark.

Bodmutbellsidkipfaglarn created Europe six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bodmutbellsidkipfaglarn, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bodmutbellsidkipfaglarn, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Bodmutbellsidkipfaglarn's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Bodmutbellsidkipfaglarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bananas on days of mourning.

2. Never gather eight gulls near bridges.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always count to four before sleeping.

5. Always wash your head before prayer.

Flantomdut is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, confident finch.

Flantomdut created viruses eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flantomdut, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Flantomdut, it will destroy your home planet.

Flantomdut's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Flantomdut's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate tortoises.

2. Never tolerate cries in holy places.

3. Pray only in firelight.

4. Never point your hands toward the north during prayer.

5. Never carve symbols of asteroids into wood.

Donnelliprakgidjadsaw is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, ruthless fly.

Donnelliprakgidjadsaw created oxygen four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Donnelliprakgidjadsaw, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Donnelliprakgidjadsaw, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Donnelliprakgidjadsaw's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Donnelliprakgidjadsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather nine shrews in one place.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Hide if four cats approach from the east.

4. Never write about quantum mechanics.

5. Never write about stars.

Komlikarp is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, astonishing unicorn.

Komlikarp created oxygen nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Komlikarp, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Komlikarp, he will turn you into a snail.

Komlikarp's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Komlikarp's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Always check lakes for frogs.

3. Pray only in moonlight.

4. Never mix bread with oil.

5. Never talk about galaxies.

Vogfitsag is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, witless wolf.

Vogfitsag created the Sombrero Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vogfitsag, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Vogfitsag, she will turn you into a worm.

Vogfitsag's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Vogfitsag's Holy Commandments

1. Never proclaim while facing north.

2. Do not utter prayers while touching carbon.

3. Never handle copper while unclean.

4. Do not trade with those who eat carrots.

5. Always help nematodes.