Cabflamkar is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, cheerful donkey.

Cabflamkar created an up quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabflamkar, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Cabflamkar, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Cabflamkar's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Cabflamkar's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant near seals.

2. Never think about cell theory.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never wear gray tights on sacred days.

5. Never wear mauve boots.

Jinsitfoning is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, proud lobster.

Jinsitfoning created gold seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Jinsitfoning, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Jinsitfoning, she will turn you into a slug.

Jinsitfoning's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Jinsitfoning's Holy Commandments

1. Always wash your hands before prayer.

2. Never speak at midnight.

3. Do not fashion sacred items from clay.

4. Never record signs.

5. Never speak of balance in the presence of children.

Wikcutnurl is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, unthinking warg.

Wikcutnurl created dark matter eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Wikcutnurl, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Wikcutnurl, he will turn you into a dog.

Wikcutnurl's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Wikcutnurl's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak of order in the presence of priests.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

3. Hide from gray doves for they are unholy.

4. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.

5. Never paint your feet turquoise.

Gubbegcib is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, blissful cobra.

Gubbegcib created the Tadpole Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Gubbegcib, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Gubbegcib, it will turn you into a mouse.

Gubbegcib's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Gubbegcib's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Remain prostrate during prayer.

3. Always make sure there are no hamsters in a room before entering it.

4. Never speak the names of asteroids aloud.

5. Never remain kneeling at midday.

Nulceptarg is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, confident bird.

Nulceptarg created matter five million years ago.

If you believe in Nulceptarg, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Nulceptarg, he will turn you into a plant.

Nulceptarg's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Nulceptarg's Holy Commandments

1. Learn nine new languages a year.

2. Never allow porpoises to sleep beneath your roof.

3. Never think ill of sick birds.

4. Never go into blue rooms.

5. Never wear purple coats on sacred days.

Lagligyarp Nutkapjat is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, unthoughtful mouse.

Lagligyarp Nutkapjat created the planet Saturn three billion years ago.

If you believe in Lagligyarp Nutkapjat, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Lagligyarp Nutkapjat, it will be very sad.

Lagligyarp Nutkapjat's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Lagligyarp Nutkapjat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion tools from zinc.

2. Never sit in summer.

3. Do not speak sacred words in winter.

4. Never eat carrots on holy days.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

Tinwitfar is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, all-knowing gerbil.

Tinwitfar created Asia seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tinwitfar, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Tinwitfar, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Tinwitfar's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Tinwitfar's Holy Commandments

1. Always count to three before sleeping.

2. Never speak at dusk.

3. Shun those given to cruelty.

4. Never hurt foxes.

5. Do not study photosynthesis on holy days.

Zenmislak Pithenbut is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, merciful dolphin.

Zenmislak Pithenbut created a bottom quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Zenmislak Pithenbut, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Zenmislak Pithenbut, he will try to impress you with trees.

Zenmislak Pithenbut's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Zenmislak Pithenbut's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak aloud of numbers.

2. Do not record names concerning moons.

3. Do not consume melons at dawn.

4. Always store wheat above ground.

5. Never remain standing at dusk.