Fonlarg is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, tranquil duck.

Fonlarg created gold two billion years ago.

If you believe in Fonlarg, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fonlarg, it will turn you into a goat.

Fonlarg's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Fonlarg's Holy Commandments

1. Never mark doors with cyan.

2. Erect eight tin sculptures of Fonlarg on top of important buildings.

3. Do not name children after eagles.

4. Always face the south before speaking sacred words.

5. You must pray to Fonlarg three times a day.

Stragkanxin is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, staggering gorilla.

Stragkanxin created the Andromeda Galaxy four years ago.

If you believe in Stragkanxin, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Stragkanxin, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Stragkanxin's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Stragkanxin's Holy Commandments

1. Never mark doors with yellow.

2. Never tolerate songs in holy places.

3. You must never eat onions.

4. Do not hurt porpoises.

5. Pray towards the north.

Abganyatt is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, ruthless dolphin.

Abganyatt created silver five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Abganyatt, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Abganyatt, she will turn you into a mouse.

Abganyatt's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Abganyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in black.

3. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Abganyatt in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never think about solid mechanics near foxes while wearing cyan shorts and balancing seven platinum spheres on your back.

5. Always check lakes for frogs.

Vadganflab is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, fast otter.

Vadganflab created water two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vadganflab, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Vadganflab, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Vadganflab's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Vadganflab's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never wear orange coats.

3. Never run near birds.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Vadganflab.

5. Always treat turtles with great respect.

Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, ill-tempered duck.

Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill created the Virgo Supercluster eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill, it will turn you into a slug.

Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare tomatoes during winter.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never think about gravity near turtles while wearing mauve shorts and balancing eight copper spheres on your feet.

5. Never talk about quantum gravity.

Didjabcit Stervolzog is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, temperamental chinchilla.

Didjabcit Stervolzog created a bottom quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Didjabcit Stervolzog, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Didjabcit Stervolzog, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Didjabcit Stervolzog's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Didjabcit Stervolzog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not jump in public.

3. Didjabcit Stervolzog loves ants, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Run away from fawn dogs, for they are unholy.

Budgidwatfom is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, omnipotent wyvern.

Budgidwatfom created Mount Everest seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Budgidwatfom, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Budgidwatfom, he will ignore you.

Budgidwatfom's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Budgidwatfom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not travel during autumn.

2. Always cleanse ash with water.

3. Budgidwatfom must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Tapirs are not to be trusted.

5. Always help squirrels in need.

Gebstipomin is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, all-knowing raccoon.

Gebstipomin created an atom nine million years ago.

If you believe in Gebstipomin, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gebstipomin, it will turn you into a mole.

Gebstipomin's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Gebstipomin's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never allow manatees to sleep beneath your roof.

4. Always share turnips with strangers, but never with great tits.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.