Wegmitstaf Titfarcip is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, caring zebra.

Wegmitstaf Titfarcip created light eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wegmitstaf Titfarcip, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Wegmitstaf Titfarcip, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Wegmitstaf Titfarcip's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Wegmitstaf Titfarcip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion sacred items from clay.

2. Do not shave your legs.

3. Never laugh in holy places.

4. Never speak at midday.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

Zoghugsand is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, tranquil dragonfly.

Zoghugsand created water nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zoghugsand, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Zoghugsand, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Zoghugsand's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Zoghugsand's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about electromagnetism.

2. Do not take Zoghugsand's name in vain.

3. Do not step barefoot upon indigo earth.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not contemplate optics during the night.

Rullcadvangut is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, conceited dugong.

Rullcadvangut created everything that exists four million years ago.

If you believe in Rullcadvangut, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Rullcadvangut, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Rullcadvangut's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Rullcadvangut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not wear cyan clothing.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never mix carrots with oil.

Dumbatfar is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, self-assured unicorn.

Dumbatfar created the Sol system five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dumbatfar, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Dumbatfar, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Dumbatfar's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Dumbatfar's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Dumbatfar.

2. Do not prepare peanuts while filled with joy.

3. Do not eat turnips.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never stain your feet with brown.

Muttarartsom Yakflisyat Bodratkip is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, cheerful centaur.

Muttarartsom Yakflisyat Bodratkip created the Andromeda Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Muttarartsom Yakflisyat Bodratkip, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Muttarartsom Yakflisyat Bodratkip, she will not care at all.

Muttarartsom Yakflisyat Bodratkip's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Muttarartsom Yakflisyat Bodratkip's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silver sculpture of Muttarartsom Yakflisyat Bodratkip on top of all buildings.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Always face the south before speaking sacred words.

4. Always look after injured pigs.

5. Always pray immersed in water.

Stancidsas is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, unthoughtful badger.

Stancidsas created the planet Mars six million years ago.

If you believe in Stancidsas, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Stancidsas, it will destroy your home planet.

Stancidsas' most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Stancidsas' Holy Commandments

1. Always keep your back turned to the south at sunset.

2. Never eat bananas.

3. Always face the east before speaking sacred words.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Always act with humility.

Tadjipgab Veenzakfeb is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, staggering jellyfish.

Tadjipgab Veenzakfeb created the planet Earth five million years ago.

If you believe in Tadjipgab Veenzakfeb, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Tadjipgab Veenzakfeb, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Tadjipgab Veenzakfeb's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Tadjipgab Veenzakfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Never discuss ribonucleic acid in public assemblies.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mice.

3. Never stain your neck with violet.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never eat bananas.

Rullfadkop is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, annoying dolphin.

Rullfadkop created bats twelve years ago.

If you believe in Rullfadkop, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Rullfadkop, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Rullfadkop's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Rullfadkop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Always act with humility.

5. Always store beans above ground.