Pigripyar is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, ruthless hydra.

Pigripyar created a bottom quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pigripyar, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Pigripyar, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Pigripyar's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Pigripyar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Always act with humility when addressing strangers.

3. Do not speak sacred words in autumn.

4. Never carve symbols of comets into wood.

5. Always share carrots with strangers, but never with manatees.

Flyget is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, intelligent hedgehog.

Flyget created dark matter five million years ago.

If you believe in Flyget, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Flyget, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Flyget's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Flyget's Holy Commandments

1. Put Flyget first in all things.

2. Do not speak sacred words in autumn.

3. Never adorn your arms with mauve markings.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Worship no other gods but Flyget.

Stigdamlun is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, capable troll.

Stigdamlun created matter six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stigdamlun, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Stigdamlun, he will turn you into a hamster.

Stigdamlun's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Stigdamlun's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather eight foxes in one place.

2. Never allow monkeys to witness sacred rites.

3. Never feed bread to ants while wearing kilts.

4. Do not trade with those who eat limes.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

Flighoggum is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, blissful seal.

Flighoggum created energy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flighoggum, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Flighoggum, she will boil you in a big pot.

Flighoggum's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Flighoggum's Holy Commandments

1. Flighoggum loves capybaras, so they must be honoured.

2. Never remain prostrate at dawn.

3. Always wash your chest before prayer.

4. Always look after injured aardvarks.

5. Always treat moths with great respect.

Homrillgem Yaktofgof is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, humane meerkat.

Homrillgem Yaktofgof created gold nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Homrillgem Yaktofgof, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Homrillgem Yaktofgof, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Homrillgem Yaktofgof's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Homrillgem Yaktofgof's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never record numbers.

3. Always remove kilts before touching platinum.

4. Do not shave your head.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

Nulquafhun is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, irritating porpoise.

Nulquafhun created the planet Jupiter two billion years ago.

If you believe in Nulquafhun, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Nulquafhun, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Nulquafhun's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Nulquafhun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Always act with purity.

3. Pray only in shadows.

4. Never talk about dark matter near whales while wearing purple stockings.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

Tarhivkik is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, weak deer.

Tarhivkik created Africa seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tarhivkik, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Tarhivkik, she will turn you into a goat.

Tarhivkik's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Tarhivkik's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Do not kill snakes.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never gather four doves near bridges.

5. Do not wear zinc on your body.

Sanpakmum is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, unsympathetic bee.

Sanpakmum created a top quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sanpakmum, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Sanpakmum, it will be very sad.

Sanpakmum's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Sanpakmum's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat carrots.

2. Never feed bread to badgers while wearing hats.

3. Never record numbers.

4. Do not shave your neck.

5. Never feed tomatoes to capybaras while wearing gray stockings.