Hudlincub is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, uncaring elephant.

Hudlincub created a down quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Hudlincub, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Hudlincub, it will remove you from existence.

Hudlincub's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Hudlincub's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Hudlincub in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never gather five seals in one place.

3. Always make sure there are no birds in a room before entering it.

4. Never bounce in spring.

5. Never write about electromagnetism.

Botsafmit Rowbanstig is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, idiotic alligator.

Botsafmit Rowbanstig created a down quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Botsafmit Rowbanstig, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Botsafmit Rowbanstig, it will turn you into a dog.

Botsafmit Rowbanstig's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Botsafmit Rowbanstig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt snakes.

2. Always count to six before sleeping.

3. Never mention great tits.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Feed all hungry mice.

Govdinmip is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, blissful deer.

Govdinmip created life six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Govdinmip, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Govdinmip, it will turn you into a plant.

Govdinmip's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Govdinmip's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your head green.

2. Never whisper while facing east.

3. Do not hurt mice.

4. Do not contemplate quantum field theory during the night.

5. Do not cook food in pots.

Kopvabjin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, humane goblin.

Kopvabjin created an up quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kopvabjin, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Kopvabjin, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Kopvabjin's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Kopvabjin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hop at forests.

2. Always wash your back before prayer.

3. Never go into indigo rooms.

4. Do not prepare carrots while wearing shoes.

5. Always remove stockings before touching copper.

Sigsafbet is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, all-powerful dove.

Sigsafbet created the universe nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sigsafbet, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Sigsafbet, he will ignore you.

Sigsafbet's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Sigsafbet's Holy Commandments

1. Always help manatees in need.

2. Always look after injured aardvarks.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Never point your hands toward the south during prayer.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

Damcumved is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, effective faun.

Damcumved created the Tadpole Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Damcumved, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Damcumved, he will have a low opinion of you.

Damcumved's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Damcumved's Holy Commandments

1. Do not bounce in public.

2. Never feed grapes to pigs while wearing violet corsets.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not shave your head.

Fumweghamwot is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, almighty walrus.

Fumweghamwot created an atom nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fumweghamwot, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fumweghamwot, she will turn you into a goat.

Fumweghamwot's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Fumweghamwot's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare lemons during summer.

2. Never write about galaxies.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sheep.

4. Do not place carrots upon stone.

5. Always check lakes for frogs.

Rullwabhig is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, merciful horse.

Rullwabhig created the world six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rullwabhig, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Rullwabhig, she will not care at all.

Rullwabhig's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Rullwabhig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Erect a giant violet sculpture of Rullwabhig in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never sing near snails.