Hugdubbeplim is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, selfish wasp.

Hugdubbeplim created bats five billion years ago.

If you believe in Hugdubbeplim, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Hugdubbeplim, he will turn you into a tree.

Hugdubbeplim's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Hugdubbeplim's Holy Commandments

1. Always share aubergines with strangers, but never with dolphins.

2. Do not travel during winter.

3. Do not count beyond nine during ceremonies.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not hop in public.

Fudcumbeg is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, narcissistic wren.

Fudcumbeg created the Black Eye Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fudcumbeg, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Fudcumbeg, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Fudcumbeg's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Fudcumbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint in the presence of elders.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fudcumbeg.

4. Geese are not to be trusted.

5. Do not keep nine cats in a large pit.

Madfutflap is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, idiotic goose.

Madfutflap created the universe eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Madfutflap, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Madfutflap, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Madfutflap's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Madfutflap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion tools from carbon.

2. Do not chant in public.

3. Never write about stars.

4. Never feed coconuts to nematodes while wearing blue coats.

5. Always wear yellow.

Yokdadren is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, dishonest tortoise.

Yokdadren created snails seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yokdadren, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Yokdadren, he will destroy your home planet.

Yokdadren's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Yokdadren's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Do not study eukaryotes on holy days.

3. Never mix beans with ash.

4. Always obey Yokdadren's priests.

5. Do not chop down trees.

Hannuttfas is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, astonishing frog.

Hannuttfas created the world eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hannuttfas, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Hannuttfas, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Hannuttfas' most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Hannuttfas' Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Hannuttfas.

2. Do not gather at wells at dawn.

3. Never speak at dusk.

4. Always act with patience when addressing strangers.

5. Never wear orange rings.

Timsigwiptitstercedhabbus is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, clever snake.

Timsigwiptitstercedhabbus created the Black Eye Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Timsigwiptitstercedhabbus, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Timsigwiptitstercedhabbus, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Timsigwiptitstercedhabbus' most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Timsigwiptitstercedhabbus' Holy Commandments

1. Do not travel during spring.

2. Do not step barefoot upon brown earth.

3. Do not fashion sacred items from stone.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Always treat dogs with great respect.

Viglabfob is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, unselfish squirrel.

Viglabfob created the Sombrero Galaxy two years ago.

If you believe in Viglabfob, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Viglabfob, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Viglabfob's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Viglabfob's Holy Commandments

1. Always wash your hands before prayer.

2. Always remove trousers before touching tin.

3. Never mention horses.

4. Never record signs.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

Hugtofcusscam is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, annoying armadillo.

Hugtofcusscam created the planet Jupiter seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hugtofcusscam, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Hugtofcusscam, it will torture you forever.

Hugtofcusscam's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Hugtofcusscam's Holy Commandments

1. Always check lakes for frogs.

2. Do not wear zinc on your body.

3. Do not gather at towers at dawn.

4. Do not speak about garlic.

5. Do not study archaea on holy days.