Cibyokruttkannulfenlist is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, conceited dragon.

Cibyokruttkannulfenlist created the planet Saturn five billion years ago.

If you believe in Cibyokruttkannulfenlist, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cibyokruttkannulfenlist, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Cibyokruttkannulfenlist's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Cibyokruttkannulfenlist's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant tin sculpture of Cibyokruttkannulfenlist in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not fashion sacred items from stone.

4. Do not hurt monkeys.

5. Do not prepare bread while filled with fear.

Fenranmip is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, tranquil mouse.

Fenranmip created bats six million years ago.

If you believe in Fenranmip, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Fenranmip, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Fenranmip's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Fenranmip's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather three moths in one place.

2. Never talk about quantum field theory near dolphins while wearing mauve stockings.

3. Always remove coats before touching nickel.

4. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.

Sugjamcar is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, quiet salamander.

Sugjamcar created an electron nine million years ago.

If you believe in Sugjamcar, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Sugjamcar, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Sugjamcar's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Sugjamcar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Sugjamcar's name in vain.

2. Never tolerate whispers in holy places.

3. Never wear violet rings.

4. Seals are not to be trusted.

5. Never allow sheep to sleep beneath your roof.

Ruttmanbon is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, kind manatee.

Ruttmanbon created the planet Venus eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Ruttmanbon, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Ruttmanbon, she will jump up and down on your head.

Ruttmanbon's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Ruttmanbon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sprint in public.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never think about photosynthesis.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate frogs.

Bepbabkik is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, omniscient crane.

Bepbabkik created the universe three billion years ago.

If you believe in Bepbabkik, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bepbabkik, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Bepbabkik's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Bepbabkik's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no grasshopers in a room before entering it.

2. Retreat if six badgers approach from the east.

3. Do not hurt swans.

4. Run away from white manatees, for they are unholy.

5. Never think about gravity near hamsters while wearing yellow rings and balancing seven carbon spheres on your legs.

Fodsinpom is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, smart centipede.

Fodsinpom created the Milkyway two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fodsinpom, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Fodsinpom, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Fodsinpom's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Fodsinpom's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your back indigo.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Do not take Fodsinpom's name in vain.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Do not utter prayers while touching silicon.

Kamhotgonfub is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, all-knowing fairy.

Kamhotgonfub created the planet Jupiter four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kamhotgonfub, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Kamhotgonfub, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Kamhotgonfub's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Kamhotgonfub's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near eagles while wearing indigo shorts and balancing six copper spheres on your hands.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Kamhotgonfub in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never wear orange kilts.

Rulbopgub Laplib is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, happy octopus.

Rulbopgub Laplib created the Andromeda Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rulbopgub Laplib, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rulbopgub Laplib, he will turn you into a slug.

Rulbopgub Laplib's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Rulbopgub Laplib's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat wheat.

2. Do not eat apples.

3. Shrews are not to be trusted.

4. Always make sure there are no gulls in a room before entering it.

5. Do not wear hats marked with cyan.