Fitmifvog Bedflyfubflatgublin is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, grumpy owl.

Fitmifvog Bedflyfubflatgublin created the world seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fitmifvog Bedflyfubflatgublin, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Fitmifvog Bedflyfubflatgublin, she will refuse to believe in you.

Fitmifvog Bedflyfubflatgublin's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Fitmifvog Bedflyfubflatgublin's Holy Commandments

1. Never stain your back with gray.

2. Tortoises are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never mark doors with fawn.

5. Never look at nebulae.

Lagsisneg is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, unsympathetic meerkat.

Lagsisneg created Europe five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lagsisneg, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Lagsisneg, she will turn you into a plant.

Lagsisneg's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Lagsisneg's Holy Commandments

1. Always help turtles.

2. Never sing in holy places.

3. Always store tomatoes above ground.

4. Never adorn your back with brown markings.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

Giggatrap Stiksaw is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, loving slug.

Giggatrap Stiksaw created Asia nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Giggatrap Stiksaw, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Giggatrap Stiksaw, he will turn you into a hamster.

Giggatrap Stiksaw's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Giggatrap Stiksaw's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow frogs to sleep beneath your roof.

2. You must pray to Giggatrap Stiksaw six times a day.

3. Never talk about gravity near monkeys while wearing white skirts.

4. Erect a large gold sculpture of Giggatrap Stiksaw on top of all buildings.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.

Flatfligtab is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, effective cow.

Flatfligtab created the world eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flatfligtab, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Flatfligtab, she will cry a lot.

Flatfligtab's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Flatfligtab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about special relativity near manatees while wearing pink shirts.

2. Do not speak of quantum mechanics near sacred fires.

3. Never jump in the presence of sharks.

4. Never feed bread to dogs while wearing jumpers.

5. Do not take Flatfligtab's name in vain.

Flowrullbanjonnanmumwik is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, able squirrel.

Flowrullbanjonnanmumwik created bats eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Flowrullbanjonnanmumwik, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Flowrullbanjonnanmumwik, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Flowrullbanjonnanmumwik's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Flowrullbanjonnanmumwik's Holy Commandments

1. Flowrullbanjonnanmumwik must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Learn five new languages a year.

3. Always maintain purity during days of mourning.

4. Always treat badgers with great respect.

5. Do not prepare tomatoes while wearing kilts.

Cimsigjen is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, pitiless zebra.

Cimsigjen created dark matter two million years ago.

If you believe in Cimsigjen, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Cimsigjen, she will destroy your favourite star.

Cimsigjen's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Cimsigjen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not name children after shrews.

2. Never chant while facing east.

3. Do not take Cimsigjen's name in vain.

4. Never talk about ants.

5. Do not drink alcohol.

Duncibven is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, emotional seal.

Duncibven created the planet Earth nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Duncibven, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Duncibven, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Duncibven's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Duncibven's Holy Commandments

1. Never record numbers.

2. Never approach forests carrying bone.

3. Always obey Duncibven's priests.

4. Do not speak of ultrasonics near sacred fires.

5. Never think about special relativity near foxes while wearing white dresses and balancing eight aluminium spheres on your legs.

Nutmotbudmantun is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, clever mouse.

Nutmotbudmantun created the Sol system three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nutmotbudmantun, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nutmotbudmantun, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Nutmotbudmantun's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Nutmotbudmantun's Holy Commandments

1. Always help snakes in need.

2. Do not prepare wheat while wearing jumpers.

3. Never talk about bacteria.

4. Do not hop at rivers.

5. Do not take Nutmotbudmantun's name in vain.