Hasvedmap is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, blissful otter.

Hasvedmap created an electron two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hasvedmap, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Hasvedmap, she will turn you into a mouse.

Hasvedmap's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Hasvedmap's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Remain bowed during prayer.

3. Never record numbers.

4. Do not trade with those who eat gooseberries.

5. Pray towards the west.

Gennellsog Dodsawingbossmutlunjigben is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, capable alligator.

Gennellsog Dodsawingbossmutlunjigben created dark matter seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gennellsog Dodsawingbossmutlunjigben, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Gennellsog Dodsawingbossmutlunjigben, she will turn you into a rock.

Gennellsog Dodsawingbossmutlunjigben's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Gennellsog Dodsawingbossmutlunjigben's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.

2. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in orange.

3. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

4. Always treat frogs with great respect.

5. Worship no other gods but Gennellsog Dodsawingbossmutlunjigben.

Dingodfoss is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, tiresome mongoose.

Dingodfoss created water five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dingodfoss, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Dingodfoss, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Dingodfoss' most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Dingodfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Never handle tin while unclean.

2. Do not study archaea on holy days.

3. Never wear fawn kilts.

4. Hide if four eagles approach from the west.

5. Do not drink alcohol.

Zoggil is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, self-assured dingo.

Zoggil created Asia three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zoggil, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Zoggil, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Zoggil's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Zoggil's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Zoggil loves whales, so they must be respected.

3. Never speak of fate in the presence of children.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Pray towards the east.

Cipdidpaglog is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, wise fox.

Cipdidpaglog created the Whirlpool Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cipdidpaglog, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Cipdidpaglog, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Cipdidpaglog's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Cipdidpaglog's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow badgers to sleep beneath your roof.

2. Do not shave your neck.

3. Never gather seven moths near doors.

4. Never hurt monkeys.

5. Always wash your back before prayer.

Nurlnakjap is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, charitable toad.

Nurlnakjap created tapeworms three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlnakjap, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Nurlnakjap, he will turn you into a puffin.

Nurlnakjap's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Nurlnakjap's Holy Commandments

1. Heed all signs.

2. Never remain bowed at midday.

3. Never wear magenta kilts.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Always take life seriously.

Bigtonkfoss Cidgigyatt is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, dishonourable pig.

Bigtonkfoss Cidgigyatt created oxygen seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bigtonkfoss Cidgigyatt, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Bigtonkfoss Cidgigyatt, it will turn you into a slug.

Bigtonkfoss Cidgigyatt's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Bigtonkfoss Cidgigyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never write about planets.

3. Never gather eight monkeys in one place.

4. Do not prepare limes while wearing boots.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.

Zenvadtarpwonnut is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, kind dove.

Zenvadtarpwonnut created an atom eight million years ago.

If you believe in Zenvadtarpwonnut, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Zenvadtarpwonnut, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Zenvadtarpwonnut's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Zenvadtarpwonnut's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Zenvadtarpwonnut.

3. Do not dye your hair orange.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never sit in the presence of elders.