Talyarpladcussawkopminnut Dotdidcen Sagontbassfub is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, duplicitous hare.

Talyarpladcussawkopminnut Dotdidcen Sagontbassfub created a Higgs boson five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Talyarpladcussawkopminnut Dotdidcen Sagontbassfub, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Talyarpladcussawkopminnut Dotdidcen Sagontbassfub, he will manifest in front of you.

Talyarpladcussawkopminnut Dotdidcen Sagontbassfub's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Talyarpladcussawkopminnut Dotdidcen Sagontbassfub's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not eat turnips.