Janfigbag is a god.
She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, impressive
tortoise.
Janfigbag created matter two thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Janfigbag, she will grant your every desire.
If you do not believe in
Janfigbag, she will not invite you to parties.
Janfigbag's most sacred site is Polagam in India.
Janfigbag's Holy Commandments1. Do not take Janfigbag's name in vain.
2. Never tolerate cries in holy places.
3. Do not run at mountains.
4. Do not speak about cherries.
5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.