Gonmitbog is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, tranquil warg.

Gonmitbog created light eight million years ago.

If you believe in Gonmitbog, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gonmitbog, he will curse you with boils.

Gonmitbog's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Gonmitbog's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no doves in a room before entering it.

2. Never approach forests carrying clay.

3. Erect a giant blue sculpture of Gonmitbog in the centre of the settlement.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.