Bindimpag Bosslunbam Canpagbet is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, impressive manatee.

Bindimpag Bosslunbam Canpagbet created the planet Mars eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bindimpag Bosslunbam Canpagbet, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bindimpag Bosslunbam Canpagbet, he will turn you into a frog.

Bindimpag Bosslunbam Canpagbet's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Bindimpag Bosslunbam Canpagbet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Always help dogs in need.

3. Always help sick turtles.

4. Do not sprint in public.

5. Erect a large silver sculpture of Bindimpag Bosslunbam Canpagbet on top of all buildings.