Dagtagjabcibvenhud is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, witty wolf.

Dagtagjabcibvenhud created an up quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dagtagjabcibvenhud, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Dagtagjabcibvenhud, he will turn you into a frog.

Dagtagjabcibvenhud's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Dagtagjabcibvenhud's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Dagtagjabcibvenhud.

2. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never sit near nematodes.