Logonttag is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, selfish unicorn.

Logonttag created parasitic wasps six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Logonttag, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Logonttag, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Logonttag's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Logonttag's Holy Commandments

1. Logonttag loves squirrels, so they must be honoured.

2. Always help foxes in need.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Erect eight gold sculptures of Logonttag on top of important buildings.

5. Always pray immersed in water.