Fenbonnak is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, caring naga.

Fenbonnak created everything that exists eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fenbonnak, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Fenbonnak, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Fenbonnak's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Fenbonnak's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention monkeys.

2. Always make sure there are no whales in a room before entering it.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Worship no other gods but Fenbonnak.

5. Never write about dwarf planets.