Flowyokfid is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, unthoughtful lobster.

Flowyokfid created a down quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Flowyokfid, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Flowyokfid, she will turn you into a rat.

Flowyokfid's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Flowyokfid's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit in the presence of elders.

2. Never speak the names of comets aloud.

3. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a building before entering it.

4. Never think about quantum field theory near manatees while wearing violet boots and balancing three aluminium spheres on your legs.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.