Hog is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, charitable chicken.

Hog created the planet Jupiter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hog, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Hog, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Hog's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Hog's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Do not speak sacred words in autumn.

3. Always make sure there are no horses in a building before entering it.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never look at black holes.