Natlamtun is a god.
It takes the form of a large, unjust
narwhal.
Natlamtun created the Sun eight million years ago.
If you believe in
Natlamtun, it will give you a free moon.
If you do not believe in
Natlamtun, it will send you a sign.
Natlamtun's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.
Natlamtun's Holy Commandments1. Do not speak of quantum mechanics near sacred fires.
2. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Natlamtun in the centre of the settlement.
3. Never adorn your hands with pink markings.
4. You must pray to Natlamtun eight times a day.
5. Never chant while facing south.