Lapcubpop is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, humane mink.

Lapcubpop created the cosmos six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lapcubpop, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Lapcubpop, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Lapcubpop's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Lapcubpop's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never write about quantum gravity.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never talk about moons.

5. Do not kill eagles.