Wipminxenten is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, confident centaur.

Wipminxenten created the Sun four billion years ago.

If you believe in Wipminxenten, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Wipminxenten, she will turn you into a puffin.

Wipminxenten's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Wipminxenten's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear mauve shirts.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Wipminxenten.

3. Do not take Wipminxenten's name in vain.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not make images of living things.