Bunlarnnullrakrilpagnarttim is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, thoughtless cow.

Bunlarnnullrakrilpagnarttim created humankind eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bunlarnnullrakrilpagnarttim, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bunlarnnullrakrilpagnarttim, he will turn you into a snail.

Bunlarnnullrakrilpagnarttim's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Bunlarnnullrakrilpagnarttim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about spacetime near dogs while wearing green boots and balancing six tin spheres on your neck.

2. Never talk about galaxies.

3. Always make sure there are no frogs in a room before entering it.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never jump near moths.