Nignuttwee is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, unthoughtful octopus.

Nignuttwee created vertebrates two billion years ago.

If you believe in Nignuttwee, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Nignuttwee, it will turn you into a frog.

Nignuttwee's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Nignuttwee's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate foxes.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Erect seven iron sculptures of Nignuttwee on top of important buildings.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.