Armtonflig is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, generous crocodile.

Armtonflig created a quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Armtonflig, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Armtonflig, she will be mildly annoyed.

Armtonflig's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Armtonflig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not take Armtonflig's name in vain.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.