Arnyarplit is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, temperamental goblin.

Arnyarplit created a bottom quark four years ago.

If you believe in Arnyarplit, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Arnyarplit, she will turn you into a goat.

Arnyarplit's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Arnyarplit's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Arnyarplit's priests.

2. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.

3. Never remain bowed at midnight.

4. Never speak of fate in the presence of priests.

5. Do not wear zinc on your body.