Komquimsog is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, intelligent guinea pig.

Komquimsog created the planet Saturn six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Komquimsog, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Komquimsog, he will torture you forever.

Komquimsog's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Komquimsog's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into fawn rooms.

2. Do not shave your feet.

3. Never sing near foxes.

4. Never look at black holes.

5. You must never eat garlic.