Artdunsak is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, narcissistic walrus.

Artdunsak created the cosmos nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Artdunsak, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Artdunsak, she will destroy your favourite star.

Artdunsak's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Artdunsak's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant copper sculpture of Artdunsak in the centre of the settlement.

2. Hide from turquoise great tits for they are unholy.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never talk about ultrasonics.

5. Never talk about nebulae.