Cemfiggen is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, fast snail.

Cemfiggen created a Higgs boson three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cemfiggen, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Cemfiggen, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Cemfiggen's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Cemfiggen's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Cemfiggen on top of all buildings.

2. Never think about nebulae.

3. Never feed carrots to dolphins while wearing coats.

4. Never think about special relativity near whales while wearing fawn shoes and balancing seven silver spheres on your feet.

5. Never look at black holes.