Rowflowjop is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, uncaring aardvark.

Rowflowjop created the Sun eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rowflowjop, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Rowflowjop, he will think nothing of it.

Rowflowjop's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Rowflowjop's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about ultrasonics near badgers while wearing cyan ear rings and balancing seven nickel spheres on your face.

2. Never think about planets.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Retreat if four sheep approach from the west.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.