Bastcatxin is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, wise unicorn.

Bastcatxin created Asia two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bastcatxin, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bastcatxin, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Bastcatxin's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Bastcatxin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill grasshopers.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bastcatxin.

3. Hide from pink pigs for they are unholy.

4. Never look at stars.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.