Flaplegyik is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, intelligent lion.

Flaplegyik created the Sunflower Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Flaplegyik, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Flaplegyik, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Flaplegyik's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Flaplegyik's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if three dogs approach from the east.

2. Never gather five eagles near bridges.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not prepare corn while wearing corsets.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.