Bangigfom Garyarpkip is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, compassionate hyena.

Bangigfom Garyarpkip created Africa eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bangigfom Garyarpkip, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bangigfom Garyarpkip, he will remove you from existence.

Bangigfom Garyarpkip's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Bangigfom Garyarpkip's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow seals to sleep beneath your roof.

2. Do not name children after grasshopers.

3. Bangigfom Garyarpkip loves horses, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not speak about pineapples.

5. Never tolerate whispers in holy places.