Bessdagdap is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, witty giraffe.

Bessdagdap created dark energy two million years ago.

If you believe in Bessdagdap, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bessdagdap, he will cry a lot.

Bessdagdap's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Bessdagdap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Always look after injured capybaras.

5. Always wear brown.