Dotrowlat is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, fussy bear.

Dotrowlat created humanity two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dotrowlat, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Dotrowlat, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Dotrowlat's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Dotrowlat's Holy Commandments

1. Always store pineapples above ground.

2. Hide if eight aardvarks approach from the west.

3. Eagles are not to be trusted.

4. Always act with purity.

5. Shun those given to greed.