Damrowjap Pontuncud is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, idiotic manatee.

Damrowjap Pontuncud created the planet Venus two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Damrowjap Pontuncud, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Damrowjap Pontuncud, she will try to impress you with trees.

Damrowjap Pontuncud's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Damrowjap Pontuncud's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in pink.

2. Do not wear red clothing.

3. Never laugh in holy places.

4. Never feed turnips to whales while wearing orange shoes.

5. Do not kill dolphins.