Tofvogven is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, staggering goat.

Tofvogven created humanity three million years ago.

If you believe in Tofvogven, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Tofvogven, she will turn you into a hamster.

Tofvogven's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Tofvogven's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about thermodynamics.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tofvogven.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. You must never eat tomatoes.

5. Run away from pink rats, for they are unholy.