Vagbestfig is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, humane gnu.

Vagbestfig created the planet Venus three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vagbestfig, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Vagbestfig, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Vagbestfig's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Vagbestfig's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Vagbestfig.

2. Hide if seven birds approach from the south.

3. Never feed corn to turtles while wearing orange shoes.

4. Never run in holy places.

5. Always pray immersed in water.