Karjapkik is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, proud cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Karjapkik created water seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Karjapkik, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Karjapkik, he will cry a lot.

Karjapkik's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Karjapkik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion sacred items from stone.

2. Always store lemons above ground.

3. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Do not bounce at forests.

5. Run away if six monkeys approach from the east.