Dimwadbim is a god.

It takes the form of a small, quiet deer.

Dimwadbim created life seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dimwadbim, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Dimwadbim, it will turn you into a puffin.

Dimwadbim's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Dimwadbim's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dimwadbim.

2. Erect a giant violet sculpture of Dimwadbim in the centre of the settlement.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Do not eat tomatoes.

5. Always make sure there are no bats in a room before entering it.