Linbumbell is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, witty faun.

Linbumbell created an electron five million years ago.

If you believe in Linbumbell, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Linbumbell, it will turn you into a snail.

Linbumbell's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Linbumbell's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not wear gold on your body.

3. Never write about planets.

4. Do not speak about bread.

5. Run away if nine geese approach from the east.