Loopminboghinstafnarlmipgad is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, tranquil duck.

Loopminboghinstafnarlmipgad created the planet Mars five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Loopminboghinstafnarlmipgad, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Loopminboghinstafnarlmipgad, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Loopminboghinstafnarlmipgad's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Loopminboghinstafnarlmipgad's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark energy.

2. Never talk about electromagnetism near horses while wearing pink tights.

3. Always make sure there are no rats in a building before entering it.

4. Do not speak about cherries.

5. Do not sing at mountains.