Sagfutced is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, effective hamster.

Sagfutced created the world seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sagfutced, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Sagfutced, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Sagfutced's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Sagfutced's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no ducks in a room before entering it.

2. Hide if six squirrels approach from the west.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate tortoises.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never run near tapirs.