Jongencemdit is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, fussy goat.

Jongencemdit created Mount Everest two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jongencemdit, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Jongencemdit, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Jongencemdit's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Jongencemdit's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about stars.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Put Jongencemdit first in all things.