Pakbugbig is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, irritating spider.

Pakbugbig created the Sol system three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pakbugbig, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Pakbugbig, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Pakbugbig's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Pakbugbig's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear kilts.

2. Do not utter prayers while touching platinum.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Do not shave your legs.

5. Pakbugbig must be the most important thing in your life.