Habkimbudhivtadsad is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, thoughtless capybara.

Habkimbudhivtadsad created parasitic wasps three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Habkimbudhivtadsad, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Habkimbudhivtadsad, he will turn you into a tree.

Habkimbudhivtadsad's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Habkimbudhivtadsad's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never sprint near sharks.

3. Never wear magenta shorts.

4. Never feed lots of oranges to whales while wearing red trousers.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.