Damgonbitrow is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, blissful spider.

Damgonbitrow created carbon eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Damgonbitrow, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Damgonbitrow, she will manifest in front of you.

Damgonbitrow's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Damgonbitrow's Holy Commandments

1. Damgonbitrow loves aardvarks, so they must be honoured.

2. Never sing in holy places.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

5. Pray towards the east.