Soggutduss is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, fussy wyrm.

Soggutduss created matter six million years ago.

If you believe in Soggutduss, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Soggutduss, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Soggutduss' most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Soggutduss' Holy Commandments

1. Hide from green great tits for they are unholy.

2. Manatees are not to be trusted.

3. You must pray to Soggutduss eight times a day.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Always make sure there are no aardvarks in a building before entering it.