Gildotbess Stanbarncussflammegfag Nakjarnnat is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, happy snake.

Gildotbess Stanbarncussflammegfag Nakjarnnat created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gildotbess Stanbarncussflammegfag Nakjarnnat, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Gildotbess Stanbarncussflammegfag Nakjarnnat, he will destroy your home planet.

Gildotbess Stanbarncussflammegfag Nakjarnnat's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Gildotbess Stanbarncussflammegfag Nakjarnnat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not study chlorophyll on holy days.

2. Do not dye your hair orange.

3. Never record names.

4. Do not speak of electromagnetism near sacred fires.

5. Always act with patience when addressing children.