Gutarfcibhan is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, caring owl.

Gutarfcibhan created a bottom quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gutarfcibhan, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Gutarfcibhan, she will make you grow a tail.

Gutarfcibhan's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Gutarfcibhan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark matter near capybaras while wearing pink kilts and balancing five nickel spheres on your face.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Never jump in holy places.

5. Never feed peanuts to tapirs while wearing corsets.