Flagfetlid Pogbugtail is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, duplicitous jellyfish.

Flagfetlid Pogbugtail created time and space nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Flagfetlid Pogbugtail, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Flagfetlid Pogbugtail, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Flagfetlid Pogbugtail's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Flagfetlid Pogbugtail's Holy Commandments

1. Erect six tin sculptures of Flagfetlid Pogbugtail on top of important buildings.

2. Never pray while filled with pride.

3. Never adorn your face with mauve markings.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Flagfetlid Pogbugtail.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near ants while wearing turquoise shorts.