Gildithig is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, compassionate tortoise.

Gildithig created Asia nine million years ago.

If you believe in Gildithig, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Gildithig, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Gildithig's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Gildithig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear zinc on your body.

2. Feed all hungry dogs.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Never go into black rooms.

5. Nematodes are not to be trusted.