Mobtonkfot is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, omnipotent naga.

Mobtonkfot created an electron eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Mobtonkfot, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Mobtonkfot, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Mobtonkfot's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Mobtonkfot's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Always make sure there are no geese in a room before entering it.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.