Yiknulweg Orthotsand is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, stupid mouse.

Yiknulweg Orthotsand created dark energy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yiknulweg Orthotsand, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Yiknulweg Orthotsand, he will have a low opinion of you.

Yiknulweg Orthotsand's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Yiknulweg Orthotsand's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about cell theory.

2. Do not sit in public.

3. Never eat cherries.

4. Do not wear platinum on your body.

5. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.