Hitbogrutt is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, fussy gerbil.

Hitbogrutt created the planet Mars seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hitbogrutt, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Hitbogrutt, it will turn you into a duck.

Hitbogrutt's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Hitbogrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Always obey Hitbogrutt's priests.

5. Always make sure there are no ducks in a room before entering it.