Flygatdim is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unthinking gerbil.

Flygatdim created the world five million years ago.

If you believe in Flygatdim, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Flygatdim, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Flygatdim's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Flygatdim's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at stars.

2. Always treat gulls with great respect.

3. Never feed lots of oranges to dolphins while wearing yellow jumpers.

4. Flygatdim loves ducks, so they must be respected.

5. Never pour water over plants.