Rulltonkven is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, unthinking bat.

Rulltonkven created life two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rulltonkven, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rulltonkven, he will not care.

Rulltonkven's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Rulltonkven's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fluid mechanics near swans while wearing fawn shirts and balancing eight zinc spheres on your back.

2. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in cyan.

3. Run away from pink porpoises, for they are unholy.

4. Do not take Rulltonkven's name in vain.

5. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.