Vonkfitgig is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, thoughtless goose.

Vonkfitgig created the planet Venus four billion years ago.

If you believe in Vonkfitgig, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Vonkfitgig, it will cry a lot.

Vonkfitgig's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Vonkfitgig's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat sheep with great respect.

2. Feed all hungry capybaras.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never talk about comets.